Nothing dims these stars

God is funny sometimes.

Ok, most of the time- but i digress…

I interviewed for a position with a research institution affiliated with my university. I’ve been waiting all week to hear back from the interviewers, but instead I got an email tonight from a different woman in a different part of the institute asking me if i was interested in a different RA. Sometimes what we pray for isn’t exactly what we get- but God makes sure we get something. Even if I don’t get this new position (which I pray desperately I do!) it is interesting to think about what the plans He really has in store for me…

I’m moving Saturday. (just an fyi, i really don’t have anything to add about that….I just felt like forest gump a little “That’s all i have to say about that”)

So anyway. I’ve lived in NC for a whole year. Thinking back on a year ago is just so outrageous. At around this point in time I was getting ready to make the trek to NC to look for an apt. and crying myself to sleep every single night because i was sooooo scared and nervous. It was especially difficult because I couldn’t let my parents find out that I was nervous- they were already clearly apprehensive about their baby girl moving 600 miles away from them, and I couldn’t add to their fears with fears of my own.

But now I feel bad again- every time my mom and I talk about NC or my life after grad school, she asks is I’m coming back to OH and every time the answer is a resounding “Nope!”

When do our parents stop holding the guilt card?

I feel like regardless of how old i get or how far away i travel, my parents will always be able to hold that card. crazzyyyyy…

Oh well. I guess loving guilt is better than disinterest, huh?

Ps. interesting tidbit i learned this week? Platypus- they’re poisonous. Who knew? (You make want to check that b/c i’m not sure about the reliability of my source..but if it is true, its pretty cool, eh?)

beginning and the end…

You are.

There is no one like our God.

despite desperation, suffering, pain, famine, plague, poverty, disease…despite all…

we’re here.

we’re alive.

we keep going, every day, despite all odds, despite our personal struggles, our own demons, despite the other people and things that try desperately to tear us away from our Father God, we get up and do it again.

and by the grace of my Savior, I’ll do it again tomorrow. I’ll do it better. and when I fall, He’ll be there. He’ll pick me up, kiss me on the head, and say “its okay. try again.”

because there is no one like our God.

the verse below gives me the biggest hugest goosebumps I’ve ever had in my entire life. its from a Chris Tomlin song, and every time I hear it, i just..can’t fathom, but it just gives me the image of all of Raleigh just rising up and serving each other. being this community that just decides that we’re going about this all the wrong way. what would our world look like if just one city started doing that? its like in class no one wants to be the first one to raise their hand or to speak up. but what if all of us just decided to be the first person to help in times of suffering, to help people in need? ponder that over dinner…

“Greater things have yet to come and greater things are still to be done in this city…”

go man, go…but not like a yo-yo

i’m moving in 2 weeks. i’m moving in 2 weeks. i’m moving. in 2 weeks.

anyway…

—

yesterday when I was praying, God gave me a big ol’ tap right on the shoulder (or a shout in the ear…hmm…) I realized that I need to have some part in ministry. I remembered when i was a kid i wanted to be a pastor, but the only way a woman in the catholic church could be involved in ministry was to be a nun (and that sure as heck wasn’t going to happen!) but yesterday i was just taking time to be quiet and talk to God and he gave me a big ol’ call. “Ashley. ministry. get over yourself.”

So, just to clarify, i am still going to be an I/O psychologist, but i know that i also need to be thoroughly involved in the ministry. I’m excited to see where this one is going to lead!

i also recently realized that i love working with teens. when i was trying to decide on a major when i was still in high school, i decided that i wasn’t going to be a music teacher b/c i knew that i definitely didn’t want to be a teacher, especially a jr high or high school teacher. now as i get older, i realize that i probably wouldn’t have minded that as much as i originally i thought i would. regrets? no. not a bit.

just keet in mind that God may have a plan for us, but I think he has a lot of options that would lead us to His ultimate plan. don’t ever count anything out!

“You’re still more awesome than I know”